Thursday, May 5, 2016

The Adventures of Lily the Cat (As Told By Lily)

Ever heard of that game Marco Polo? I love that game! So I like to play it whenever I can. My human seems to love playing the game too. I'll just randomly start a round, sometimes I'll even be in the same room as her, just to see if she's paying attention. I've found the best way to play Marco Polo is to be as loud as possible and repetitive until she responds, that way my human knows for sure I'm playing the game. It's so much fun! Especially at night when she's turned out all the lights and is laying in that nice big bed of mine I let her use.

Thursday, April 28, 2016

The Adventures of Lily the Cat (As Told By Lily)

So I lost a tooth the other day. It was weird, I was just sitting with my human and it just fell out. My human gave me a weird look as I was sniffing my tooth trying to figure out what had just happened. My human seemed pretty confused too. It was a big tooth! Those little ones are hardly noticeable when they fall out, but this big one seemed to freak out my human. For me it turns out that was the pain I was feeling and hiding from my human! We cats mustn't show weakness!  I feel so much better now though, and can eat like a champ again. My scavenging excursions are going to be even better now! My human keeps annoying me though checking my mouth every few minutes. Sheesh boundaries!

Monday, April 25, 2016

Slang Word Pet Peeves




So now days it seems that you can just make up a word, or pick an existing word and change its meaning. Granted, this has been happening since the dawn of time, but it seems like with the interwebs, this is more prevalent now than ever before. Some of these words are actually horribly annoying, not cute and make you sound downright stupid. So I thought I'd list the ones I absolutely cannot stand, and that are overly used:

Bae. Ugh! This is my numero uno pet peeve word. Guys it means poop. If you're using this to describe your significant other, you're a total jerk. No one wants to be called poop! You want to shorten the loving term "baby"? Then call them "babe", that's the short version of baby. Always has been.

Meow in place of now. This isn't cute, this is just dumb. Why do we want to make a cat sound when we're emphasizing an urgency? Cat cries are irritating, and so is meow. Just say now, then I'll know you really mean it.

Yas in place of yes. Does saying "yas" really express your excitement better then "yes"? No! It's not even a word people. If you want to agree emphatically please just do so actually using the word "yes" and extend it out like "yessssss", at least it's still an extension of a real word. All "yas" does is remind me of the 80's band Yaz and then I get their one hit stuck in my head. It's annoying.

Others I could do without, but don't bother me as much (including a few acronyms):

On Fleek - I'm not entirely sure what this means honestly. I have an idea...
Adorbs - I have used this as an ironic term on occasion. Never actually seriously.
Totes - Same with this one. They crack me up at how dumb they sound.
Yolo - Again used ironically, because duh! I'm not sure who thinks they're getting to live twice...
Cray - Another used ironically, because really? Too lazy to just say crazy?
LOL - Are you really laughing out loud every time? I don't think so.

Ones that I actually don't mind:

Ship
Can't Even
WTF
AF
Legit

Yep I'm an 80-year-old crotchety woman, but can accept some things. No shame.




Thursday, April 21, 2016

The Adventures of Lily the Cat (As Told By Lily)

Yesterday was my birthday! I turned 13, and now my human really gets to see what I can bring to the table. I have the teenager excuse now. Honestly I didn't even know it was my birthday, but my human started being extra nice to me. I got treats and catnip. It. Was. Awesome. So I knew there had to be a reason, and turns out birthdays are kinda cool. I may have overdone it on the catnip though. I felt pretty stoned out for a bit there, I couldn't move, and I may have even drooled some. Ah well, YOLO! Oh and my human thought it would be fun to film my getting high. Whatevs, I own it. It was fun.


Thursday, April 14, 2016

The Adventures of Lily the Cat (As Told By Lily)

My human was talking on the phone the other day and I really really needed to tell her something. I thought it was so rude she was talking to someone else and not paying attention to me all the time. So I decided the best course of action would be to talk to her and get her attention so she would hang up the phone. So that's what I did. I decided that only talking a bit wouldn't do the trick, so I just kept going. She thought petting me would get me to stop, she was wrong. It just made me want to talk louder. She wasn't paying attention to me! Finally she got off the phone, but at that point I was bored, and didn't want to tell her my thing anymore. So I walked away. Man my human is rude.

Monday, April 11, 2016

My New Hobby

I've been trying out a new hobby as of late. I'm sure a lot of you have seen the nail art videos that plague the internets, mainly Facebook, and yes I was sucked in. But in my defense, I am an artist, well a wanna-be-artist, and so to me getting artsy on a nail is just a smaller canvas really. I've only been doing this for a couple months now, and mostly it's been on my own nails, which has been a major thing for me in and of itself (I don't like my nails painted. I know go figure). But I'm starting to feel like I'm actually getting the hang of this thing, and I enjoy trying to come up with new designs. So I thought I'd share some of the ones I've done thus far, and will post an update from time to time of additional designs I come up with.

So this is my very first attempt. I hadn't painted my own nails, let alone any one else's in years and years, so for a first try, I didn't do too shabby:



I then attempted to do my friend Jordan's nails, and quickly learned I'm not that great on someone else. I have better control on my own nails, which is odd. This was my first try at a sponge technique which came out quite well for a first try. This was also my first attempt at using strip tape to create a design, and learned I need to let the paint dry a little longer before removing the strips. It's all a learning process for sure!



I also learned how to take a better picture of the finished product. I got a little better with the sponge technique as well, and learned that when painting over strips, that sponging is much more kind:


My next design I wanted to try a different take on the french tip. I used strip tape to give the tip effect, I also have this cool "splatter" nail polish that I layered over the red:


I've been trying to get better with the stamp technique, which is actually quite difficult! Don't let those videos fool you, the stamps are hard. So this was my first stamp design that turned out decent enough I didn't feel like I had to wipe it off:


And finally we're to the design I did last night. It's again a stamp design because I'm determined to perfect this technique, since it's so challenging:


Thanks for indulging me in this new little hobby of mine! And for those wondering, each painting has lasted me nearly two weeks, a few only a little over a week, but a clear base coat and a couple clear top coats do wonders for longevity.

Thursday, April 7, 2016

The Adventures of Lily the Cat (As Told By Lily)

I've been really bored with my food lately. My human seems to think this dry stuff is good for me, and rarely lets me eat anything else. She says it's good for my belly, well I'm guessing that's what she's saying. She rubs my belly a lot while making warbling sounds. Whatever. So I've taken it upon myself to scavenge for food while she's not looking. The other day I found a nice hot tray of delicious turkey fats and juices just sitting there asking to be eaten. How could I say no? My tongue was a little sore after from the scalding liquid, but it was worth it.

My human made cookies the other day, and I thought I'd do her a service and taste test them as soon as she pulled them out of the oven. Again my tongue was sore, but worth it! I feel like she should appreciate my services.

Last night I got to lick the pan of where some sort of meat had been cooked. I didn't much care what kind, the pan tasted amazing! This scavenging thing is becoming so easy! I'll just ignore the fact that my human has caught me every time so far, it just means I need to better my skills. Maybe being quiet isn't working...